Overheard at the kitchen counter

Mary-Beth: Hey Jonah, let's play that you're a lousy doctor.
Jonah: Okay.... You? Are dead.

(That's lousy, alright.)

Jonah says we should move the toaster.

"We should put it over there (finger gun pointed at the coffee station) by the cinnamon and sugar. (shrug) Y'know, for when you're making toast. It'll be closer to the cinnamon and sugar. (shrug) Then you could put cinnamon and sugar on all the toast. (finger gun pointed at me)"

Why didn't I think of that?

Ask a stupid question...

Jonah: "I don't like green beans, Mom."

Me: "Really? Wow. Green beans rock! Why don't you like them?"

Jonah: "I think it's the beans part I don't like."

It's a man thing.

Jonah found out he was going to get to visit with my friend Debbie's son Emmitt (who is 13 years old and super fun) while I was out running errands. He said, "Ooh! Can I wear a baseball shirt? Cuz I wanna play football with Emmitt and (insert finger gun) have a race."

She's good at so many things.

Jonah and Mary-Beth were playing "Don't Laugh," a game during which you try to keep a straight face while the other person tells you not to laugh.

It's harder than it sounds. Go ahead and try it. Don't laugh! Don't do it. Don't you laugh!

See?

So Jonah had just lost at his turn and, at the end of his laughing fit, said, "Y'know, Hazel is REALLY good at this game."

Meet Hazel:

Fun sucker.

Jonah: I'm a snoooow! dinosaaaaaaur! Rrrrrrroooowwwwrrrrr!

(pause)

Mary-Beth: You're not even a snow man.

Alrighty then

I just had to tell Mary-Beth that lip gloss doesn't belong on her eyebrows. She disagreed. She's lucky that pink is her color.

More "don't ask don't tell"

I'm choosing not to pursue the facts regarding the orange peel I just found inside the boy's sock. I'm just.... not going to ask.